• Domestic Violence,  Love,  Relationships

    Insecurity in a relationship

    Lying, cheating women tend to use insecurity as a crutch in relationships. How?   First one must ask; how many times has my girl done some significantly shady shit and when approached responded, ” You’re so insecure.”? Where do we draw the fine line between identifying insecurity and identifying  intuition?

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    Ha I’m such a geek!! I’m learning how to use UNIX scripts to automate my blog posts via email. I truly have no life.

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    the ch chronicles

    this shitload of confusion between myself and ch is neverending. the dynamic thus far is bittersweet. she stalked me for a new york minute and I let her back into my life as just a friend or so I thought. we’d previously come to an amicable agreement of friendship which turns out to be not-so-amicable. last night she asked if I’d be her girl again. [INSERT GAS FACE HERE]

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    Just the little things

    This pretty picture is my ¾ eaten lunch. Soup of the day was Red Peas soup. Sorry I demolished it before even thinking about taking a photo Now to most of you non-west Indian individuals this might look a little gross. But shyt to me it’s a likkle piece a yaaad. I was thinking about that as I was eating it and It made me think about just the little shyt I tend to take for granted. Picture life in a world with no Red Peas Soup. So the thought of the day like the soup of the day is: Cherish what you got coz tomorrow it might be gone.

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    Still trying to catch my second wind

    Dear Diary, I’m not sure what my Job Security is like here. Everything just seems so dismal and I’m in a position that presents a challenge, I’d say it’s the biggest professional challenge I’ve ever had to face. Should things not pan out the way I plan, I don’t really think I’ll  have a plan B. Everyone I know is going through tough times. The “haves” worry about losing and the “have nots”  worry about finding (which in today’s harsh reality is least likely). I’ve been like this since the beginning of the year and at some point, I’d made the decision not to let things bother me.  But as…

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    Unusual Shit…

    Last night I had this dream. I saw a navy blue Nissan Altima 2008 parked outside my house. The back door was caved in along with the compartment that houses the gas tank. The car literally looked as if it had been hit with an IED in Iraq. So this morning, I get up and head to work. On my way I run into traffic due to an accident. As I’m driving past the scene I look up at the vehicle on the truck to notice it’s the car in my dream.

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    Sifting through the Wreckage

    I found survivors.   CH and I are back on speaking terms.  We agreed to be friends.  I spent perhaps the last 2 or 3 weeks ignoring her phone calls, instant messages and text.   I think I really needed that time to clear my mind.   Yesterday I sent her a text.  Small talk ensues then she tells me she really needs to talk.   So I called her.   I talked more than she did as usual.   I’m not sure why I’d expected anything to change.  But she talks about how I shut her out and blah blah blah.   I go on to remind her of my attempts to open up to her…

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    For Future Reference

    Since when is being evil synonymous with being Human?   Now don’t get me wrong I never said that we all should be perfect, because no one can.   But, one would hope that we would never give up the struggle to be the best we can.   Instead I see things taking a turn for the worse.   I’m living in a society where more and more I see supreme effort being placed on nurturing the more vile aspects of humanity.   Things are changing and it’s hard for me to keep my head up.  It’s not just a financial recession we’re in.   It’s also spiritual.   Now I know I’m not perfect.  I made…